In practicing the loving-kindness exercise first I was sad. Not everyone will gain freedom from suffering and not everyone will find sustained health, happiness, and wholeness. My parents died several years ago. Maybe I miss them because it is Memorial Day. I just know that today I miss them very much. I may not like how they handled things and some of the things they did, but today I believe that they did the best they could with what they knew. I was 15 when dad died of a heart attack and 20 when mom died of cancer. I learned a lot of things from them, mostly of what not to do. I don't ever remember hearing a simple phrase like "I love you" from either of them. I can't change the past but I can change what I do. I tell my kids every day that I love them and I am proud of them. As I continued the exercise I also felt confident and loving. I can assist people in gaining freedom from suffering and finding sustained health, happiness, and wholeness.
During the assessment I discovered that the area I have chosen to focus on is my emotional health. There has been a lot of fear and negativity at home and work lately. I have let it get to me and I have let it dictate how I feel and how I react to people. I need to refocus my mind to be positive and happy. I need to focus on showing loving-kindness and compassion. I need to focus on what I have and less on what I don't have.
I plan to meditate and pray more. I also play to listen to quiet music more. I believe that if I can get some physical exercise such as walking or riding my bike that will help too. This weekend was a very stressful one because my daughter got hurt roller blading and we were at the hospital twice. I finally realized that I needed to step back and relax. I sat in my back yard swing with my headphones and music on. It was not long and I found myself laying in the swing and actually fell asleep. What was more amazing was the kids were quiet and let me sleep. That was the best nap in a long time. I woke up rested and ready to tackle whatever I needed to.
Donna,
ReplyDeleteI wonder how hard it would be to train others to be loving and kind ;) Often it is the individuals that we constantly have to deal with that sucks the energy right out of us!
I read something in our lesson that basically said we learn from the parent, and if the parent didn’t experience love, compassion, etc. and it wasn’t shown to the child then they wouldn’t know either.
By admitting that you want to show your children, and say the words “I Love You” that it has actually become a step in your integral health and ultimately healing as well.
Truly enjoyed your post!
Karen